Rescue Mission Blog

Using humor to help move teams forward

  

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Often managers use anger and berating as a first option when trying to get people in motion.  Often using humor and a lighthearted approach is the best way to get people working in the same direction.  People get entrenched and defensive when attacked, but open up when they are working in collaboration and when appreciated and respected.  

In 1863 the famous author Charles Dickens had a problem with his clock.  It was no longer chiming on the hour.  Rather than attack the clockmaker who had tried to "fix" the problem, he used a winsome approach.  Here's a copy of his note:

Gad's Hill Place, Higham by Rochester, Kent,

Monday Night, Fourteenth September, 1863

My dear Sir, 

Since my hall clock was sent to your establishment to be cleaned it has gone (as indeed it always has) perfectly well, but has struck the hours with great reluctance, and after enduring internal agonies of a most distressingly nature, it has now ceased striking altogether.  Though a happy release for the clock, this is not convenient to the household.  If you can send down any confidential person with whom the clock can confer, I think it may have something on its works that it would be glad to make a clean breast of.

Faithfully yours,

Charles Dickens

Are there problems which you are facing which seem deeply entrenched? Is it possible that by using humor you could help others to see the nature of the problem and get the problem moving?

David Curry

(letter from Forbes Book of Great Business Letters)

Building a reputation

  

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Herb and Dorothy Vogel lived fairly anonymous lives for many decades.  Herb was a clerk in the post office, Dorothy a librarian at the Brooklyn branch of the New York Public library.  They were not people of means.  But...they loved art.  Every night they would go to art exhibits, openings and events.  They befriended up and coming artists and had them over for dinner.  They supported the artists when they could, living off of Dorothy's salary and using Herb's to buy art.  Slowly, over decades, they amassed one of the most amazing art collections of modern times...and they did it on a budget.

Now they're well known, and famous in the art world.  60 minutes has done stories on them, and they had a documentary made of their life and art collection (which I highly recommend). 

How did the Vogel's build their reputation in the art world without the benefit of hoards of money?  They built it one day at a time, one decision at a time.  

So many people want the benefits of momentum, of a good reputation, without paying the daily price.

David Curry

The lowest form of critique

  

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From a distance, a critic looks equal to a producer.  But it's not the same.  Critique can be helpful, especially when it comes from someone who has also produced, and fought similar battles. 

The lowest form of critique, one popular today but that we should avoid at all costs, is mockery.  It is reserved for the intellectually lazy.

"Mockery is often the result of a poverty of wit"

Jean de la Bruyere

It adds nothing, and it destroys much.  Perhaps the worst thing about mockery is the self-satisfaction it gives the one who delivers it.  You feel good while mocking another, but you are damaging your own self.  No one likes a mocker, and many people fear them, so you are slowly isolating and marginalizing yourself.

Are you ever tempted to mock or make fun of the work of others?  Are there good points to mockery?  Let me know what you think.

David Curry

Impossible since 1865.

  

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So often people use the excuse "it's impossible" when they really mean "I don't want to do this because it's difficult".  

But this isn't a new phenomena.  German businessman Alfred Krupp wrote this to his employees in 1865 on how to best approach the problems that confronted his company at that time:

12/3/1865

Not pressing, only an incidental observation.

If I had not wanted to set to work until all arrangements were complete, I should today be a journeyman.  To attain one's end with the smallest means, to work and to earn without losing time, that is the task, and that is what I ccannot sufficiently recommend to you gentlemen as a the practical thing.  To raise difficulties is is very comfortable, but to get over difficulties (without making a fuss about them) is what we need--time should be valued more highly.  

Action and strenuous activity is the one remedy for excuses on the score of "impossibility".  It makes the impossible possible-the "impossible" is too readily recognized-as a matter of comfort.

Alfred Krupp

What keeps you from steadily working on those things which seem insurmountable?  Why do we build tasks up in our minds to be too difficult to tackle?

David Curry

To Rescue Mission Staff re: Equality

  

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To the staff of the Rescue Mission:

Always remember we are called to serve the hurting, poor, homeless & hungry. 

We will help anyone, without exception, if they are willing and we are able to do so.  

We will love and serve everyone, regardless of their color, faith, sexual preferences, marital status, habits, physical appearance, etc.   

"What would Jesus do?" 

David Curry

Non-profit leadership: Mission Impossible effort/minimum payoff

  

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Fans of Mission Impossible, Thomas Crown and other heist movies will remember with fondness the scenes of daring thieves rapelling down into a art museum to steal millions of dollars of paintings.  The idea of dashing art thief has been around for a while, and it sounds romantic.  

Only this week in Olympia a pair of art thieves got it wrong, and in doing so illustrated a little problem many of us have: going to a lot of effort, eliciting a bunch of drama, for very little benefit. (Story in News Tribune)  Apparently the thieves broke into an Olympia art gallery, rappelled down into the museum, and after great effort....stole two paintings worth a combined $1400.  $1400.?  Aren't they supposed to make off with millions?  Not in this case.

Going to great dramatic effort for very little payoff is common in many areas of life, not the least of which is the non-profit world.  How many times have you seen huge fundraising pushes to raise a few thousand dollars?  Or entire organizations developed, overhead taken on, offices rented, and letterhead printed...only to open a non-profit with limited scope of work, open a few days a weeks, to help a handful of people.  Such a waste.  

Here's a few ways you can check to make sure the effort of your charitable work will be wisely invested:

Is the work critical?  Some problems are not critical, life threatening or pressing.  If you find yourself gearing up in a huge way, make sure it's in service to a critical issue.  Why is this important? Because many efforts struggle because potential supporters sense that the cause isn't critical and so they don't engage.  Then you have a situation, which is common in the non-profit world, where an organization exists, but continually struggles because it's scope is too limited to gain interest of a wide range of support.

Is the work essential?  Some work is critical, but organizations don't scale it up to seem essential, thus the effort suffers.  Hunger is a critical issue, but often organizations don't approach it as essential, for example: only feeding once a day or once a week.  Either it's criticial or it's not, but donors will not respond to half measures.

Does it scale?  Some ideas need to be done on a large scale to be effective, and other ideas are exposed as weak or timid when you imagined them scaled up.  What would your program look like if it was national or internationa?  Would the overhead needed to make that possible be worth the payoff?  Often times governments get services wrong because they can take any program national without much effort, so you end up with programs that are not rightsized for the dollars needed to make it happen.  Some ideas don't scale, and asking yourself the question at the beginning will help you make good decisions in evaluating what to do, and what to do big.

Am I wrong to question the efficacy of charitable programs? Push back and let me know if you think my reasoning is wrong.  I'd love to hear your feedback.

David Curry

What Kodak's bankruptcy means for non-profit leaders

  

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Last week Kodak filed for bankruptcy.  (Here's a great blog from Seth Godin on the subject.)For many people the idea of a company that was once as solid and blue-chip as Kodak being forced to restructure, and ultimately perhaps be sold off for it's pieces, is shocking.  

But there are lessons for business and non-profit leaders, and they are lessons we need to be painfully aware of:

1. You're never too big to fail.  Pridefulness, and your personal inability to imagine your business ceasing to exist, doesn't mean it won't happen.  In fact, those attitudes are exactly what put Kodak into trouble in the first place.  They never imagined what would happen if htey didn't evolve.

2.  Take the leap.  At some point Kodak needed to bet the farm on a technology that wasn't wrapped up in film, but they didn't do it, and now they're irrelevent.

3.  Have your vision be broader than a technical or specific unit of delivery.  Kodak was in the film business.  They promoted like they were in teh memory business, but they didn't manage that way.  If they had a broader operating purpose, to capture images-no matter what the technology, there is no doubt they'd still be a successful business.

4. Reinvest in the future.   My guess is that in the good times, they reinvested in keeping the good times going, and not in digital, and other cloud based image capturing systems.  They were tepidly interested in digital, but were outpaced by so many others that they eventually seemed to give up on it all.  

There are so many lessons in the Kodak story.  What are your thoughts and opinions about how they could have moved to save their company?  What parts of their story translate to your work?

David Curry

Great quotes: Problem solving

  

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"While average people are thinking negatively about problems, successful people view their problems positively.  They love problems.  They eat them for breakfast.  

Why? Because problems create value, and the more problems you can solve, the more valuable you will be, the more money you will make, the more responsibility you will have."

Brian Klemmer

When Good Intentions Run Smack into Reality

Problems are not your enemy.

  

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Most people dismiss problems and challenges as "always bad" and "never good".  But life isn't that clearcut.  Many of our biggest breakthroughs come through addressing entrenched problems.  

Brian Klemmer, in his book "When Good Intentions Run Smack into Reality", says this, "That is why problems are your best friends, they help you reach your goals, moving beyond what you could do in the power or knowledge you now possess."  

Here a few tips for getting started:

1. Acknowledge the challenge.  Sometimes problems are like that weird uncle at the family gathering, you try to move around the room to avoid the awkward conversation, but eventually it's going to happen and the avoidance just makes it worse.  So it is with problems. Not acknowledging something is a problem, or that you are stuck, is only making it impossible to handle.

2.  Gather a team around you.  Somethings are better addressed with council, and in groups.  Really smart and successful people work in groups, and use each others expertise.  You need to get a group around you that can help you address and meet the challenges of the problems you face.  

3.  Get a game plan.  Once you know what the problem is, and  you have the guidance and help you need, you can start to map out how you will work on the problems and challenges you face.  Decisions have to be made, and it takes time, but you'll be moving forward on what you once thought was an immovable object.

What are some ways people get stuck on problems? Why do we avoid and ignore obviously challenges in front of us? I'd love to get your feedback.

David Curry

Journaling through Challenging days: part 2

  

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Just a few weeks ago I shared a blog about Journaling through challenging days, which talked about how important it is to write out your thoughts and emotions when you are going through grief, struggle and difficulty.  At that time, I shared the eulogy I had written for my grandmother, who was very close to me and everyone in my family.  

Today we honoring my mother Barbara Curry, and her life, after she passed away last Wednesday January 11, 2012 from complications from a reaction to some medication given her during heart surgery.  Since we all go through this, at least four of us in the Administration office at the Rescue Mission have buried a parent this year, I thought I would again share the eulogy I will be reading today at the funeral.  

My hope is that by sharing my personal journey, it will encouarge you to journal and write as you travel down the path you are walking.

A Eulogy for my mother, Barbara Curry.

Barbara Annette Curry was born on July 12, 1941 and passed away with her family around her on January 11, 2012.  She left a legacy of her husband Stuart, sister Sharon Glassy, her children Steven (Coleena) Curry, Robert Curry, Becky DelaCruz, David (Kate) Curry, Dean (Anne) Curry, and Stuart (Ann) Curry. She had 17 grandchildren, and 3 great-grandchildren. 

Some people cannot easily be defined with a few words.  Barbara could be: Jesus, Family, Friends, and parties.  Just a few weeks ago our family said goodbye to my Grandmother Frances Glassy.  The two passing away so closely together has been especially challenging.  Frances lived a particularly long and full life.  She was a person with a handful of incredibly deep and meaningful relationships, and we loved her for her ability to be so influential in her small, direct circle.  Barbara, while having the same loving demeanor, was a person who had a wide and ever expanding circle of friends.  All of whom, even if she just met them, she was invested in and cared about...and we loved her for it.  

She had hobbies: Gardening, collecting dolls, and other things.  Some suspected that she might be adding hobbies so that she could participate in more parties, meetings, get-togethers and small groups.  Any reason, no matter how small, was a valid excuse for getting together to Barbara.  If there was no apparent reason for a party, she would begin to build up a small event to justify the party.  

Barbara was a great wife to Stuart Curry.  She was a loving and patient person, who cared for, and took interest in, Dad and his hobbies.  Dad returned the favor and was always happy to accompany her to her events and clubs.  I think I speak for Stuart when I say that he has no particular interest in paper dolls.  For Dad to participate with mom in her gardening clubs, paper dolls events, and other things, it had to be love.  They were a pair for over 40 years and their love got better with time. 

The priority for her was her grandchildren and children.  She was a loving mom, a doting and thoughtful grandmother and great-grandmother.  Whatever interest her kids and grandkids had, she invested in it and tried to share it.  Each season she had traditions that she built with first her children and then grandchildren, which were so important to her, because they were connection points with the ones she loved.  Her love for her family was returned to her.  We love her very much and  we mourn her absence.  Because Barbara loved people, she was most often the one who brought us together.

Her capacity for friendship was limitless.  She had so many friends because she was a good friend.  Always remembering her friends and finding interest with others, her selflessness was shown in how she focused on others.  Since her passing we have heard from so many of her friends, each with a different connection and often from different groups, but all who loved her and thought her to be one of the kindest people they’d ever met.  Because she was.  Here are just a few of the notes people have left for her: 

Kathleen wrote:  Barbara was twice my roomie at the Cannon Beach Women's Retreat, she was my fundraising partner for the HIV/AID orphans in Lesotho, Africa, a fellow chocolate lover, and a Jesus girl.  Barbara, I will always think of you when smores are on the menu, lavender is in bloom and women's small groups convene. The children you never met on the other side of the world will always remember the Love of the Lord thanks to your generous spirit.  

Chris wrote:  Dear Barbara, Jesus has indeed given you a new heart. You will be missed here, but we know that you are resting completely in Jesus. It has been such a blessing to be in prayer with you weekly over the year.  You are such a beautiful woman of God and we will all join you for the greatest family reunion.  Save a seat for me next to you 

Val wrote:  I am so, so thankful God gave us extra special memories this Christmas with one another. God knew that those memories would be treasures for me to have when you were gone. Oh, what a good time you are having with my Mom in heaven...I am sure she is thanking you for loving me like a daughter while on this earth.

Gayle wrote: I loved your zeal for Christ and how you put all your energies into His work, your family, and friends. What an encouragement you were to me in the Moms In Prayer ministry.

Darlene wrote: Barbara, cookie grandma, showed me what a true grandma/mom should be, she was my first grandma experience.  The love she shared with me was wonderful and I will never ever forget her and her beautiful smile.  I cherished those wednesday nights when we would have dinner at Stuart and Barbs, loved sitting around the table and enjoying her delicious food. Her house was always full of kids, love and laughter.   

....and there are so many other friends who could say the same thing and more.

That was Barbara Curry.  There were many powerful lessons that she exampled to those that were paying attention.  Never take offense, always be loving, encourage others, serve one another, be hospitable and be forgiving.  She wasn’t one to keep a grudge or replay past hurts, and she certainly could have.  People let her down and she had disappointments and discouragement's.   Yet when you talked to her you sensed she wasn’t looking for the worse, but trying to find the best.  Our family often remarked that she could find something good to say about anyone.  What a wonderful gift that is.  

Her family was a tight knit group.  The three girls were her mother Frances, her sister Sharon and Barbara.  They raised and cared for our family together, the three of them.  Barbara didn't do it alone.  Those three women and my dad Stuart worked hard, nurtured and provided for their family.  The result is a group of people who stick together, believe the best of each other, and forgive each other when necessary, and it is often necessary.  But that is what she did and would do.

When we lost our Frances, GG, a few weeks ago we all took it pretty hard.  I’m certain that my mother, Becky and Sharon took it hardest of all, although they were so graceful about their grief.  However, Barbara struggled with having my grandmother gone.  My mother called GG every morning, as she did with many people, and talked with her for at least a half an hour, and she deeply missed that time.  She commented that mornings were so tough without GG, and that she sometimes didn’t know what to do without her.

As she was praying and working through her grief she decided that her focus for the new year would be grateful.  That was her word for 2012.  She would be grateful.  

As she was working through her grief for the loss of her mom, and desiring to work on gratitude, she wrote out a reminder to herself to read each day while she was in the kitchen. It simply said this:

“It’s not about me, it’s about what’s best for her.”

Barbara wanted to remind herself that she knew, no matter how much she missed her mom, that she was in heaven, healthy, and happy.  

Now her family and friends are just as disappointed and sad that she is gone.  The doctors did a great job on the surgery and her nurses worked hard to care for her.  But her body had an extremely rare reaction to the medication that was given to help her through the surgery.  So she started to slip away.  You can’t predict those kinds of rare events and it leaves you with bunches of question and discouragements.  It was a very bad day.  Yet, our family knows that she is with Jesus.  We also know that she is with her mom, GG, and they are laughing and enjoying each other.  How nice that they are together. 

When we miss her, when we are lonesome for her friendship and wanting to hear her voice, we will all remind ourselves what she reminded herself just a few days ago:  It’s not about me, it’s about what’s best for her.

Amen

 David Curry

January 18, 2012